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The Transition to University: Navigating Adulthood Challenges

The Transition to University: Navigating Adulthood Challenges

A few weeks into university life …

Entering university marks a significant milestone in a young person’s life, filled with excitement, challenges, and a multitude of unknowns. Jinty, a fictional student in this article, embodies the apprehensions and dilemmas that many individuals face as they step into this new phase. This article delves into Jinty’s journey, exploring themes of homesickness, friendships, academic pressures, and the need for support during this transitional period.

Read about coping with change and homesickness; making new friends; dealing with new academic pressures, and Happy Brain TIPS for parents and students currently experiencing this transition.

A few weeks ago, Jinty’s university experience began…

After weeks of stuffing bags full of things acquired over the past 18 years; old pictures, duvets and favourite cushions… she realised how they’d all seen her grow up. Now they’re trapped between the cold edges of Ikea bags, crammed up against new shiny crockery, pans, unfamiliar new mugs. She’s no idea where they’re going to end up. Just like her.

Flinging her favourite cuddly toy into the bag seems cruel but in this new dawn of adulthood, taking it with her feels comforting. She can’t help but wonder, ‘will I feel safe there? Will I be warm enough? Will I be able to sleep?’

She reckons she’s no good at cooking, too. Will she end up surrendering herself to a diet of pot noodles like social media claims she will? Those new pots and pans might gather dust in the cupboard, barely out of their plastic containers. It seems to be what all freshers do, she surely doesn’t want to be the different one obsessing over carrots and vitamins whilst everyone else is having the time of their lives.

The statistics don’t lie, a recent survey revealed that 1 in 10 first year students will never cook, and a quarter more will be spending their maintenance loan on takeaways.  But, Jinty has always had a balanced diet and who knows what might happen without this. Especially if she’s clubbing every night, which seems to be what all the ‘Freshers’ do. All the times she’s been hungover before it’s been with the luxury of weeks in-between drinking to recuperate with home cooked meals. Without that in Freshers Week, Jinty already fears she will feel out of balance.

And then there’s the money worries. Financial struggle is a top student concern, with 92% of respondents in a Student Beans survey worrying about this, and 67% voicing concerns that they will not be able to pay back their debts after university. Like many first-time students, Jinty has not had to manage much financially before now. She’s never actually bought the food shop, or been responsible for doing her own washing or transport before. What if she finds it difficult to cope/ manage and ends up running out of money?

Jinty’s worries begin to reduce her emotional resilience.

Homesick

In the last few years, Jinty’s gained independence taking care of her own responsibilities, handling 3 A-Levels, a part time job, extra-curricular sports, and a buzzing social life. So why is it that now, in the twilight of her teenage years, it’s the security of Mum and Dad she’s craving? A recent study found the major things people miss about their homes are their family, their feelings at home and the comfort of activities in this place. Studies have found that students experiencing homesickness are likely to have less focused/ productive educational experiences and are more likely to develop mental health problems whilst at university. She may or may not have developed skills to help cope with  homesickness. Her parents may or may not have the skills to help her feel the freedom to leave the nest without guilt.

Worst of all, what if no-one else feels homesick and she’s the only one? Social media is littered with posts about how Freshers’ is the best year of one’s life. But, what if Jinty feels that her experience does not match this expectation? She reckons it’s unfair that the adults in her life are telling her that it’s going to be amazing, and ‘should’ be the best few years of her life. She feels under pressure to conform to their (well meaning) standards and supress any experience to the contrary.  54% student respondents in one study knew someone who had experienced negative events at university, with ⅓ of these people reporting this person dropped out as a direct result of this experience. Jinty wonders how the student support system will help her to avoid living through other people’s expectations, and even stimulate  a more resilient attitude.

Jinty’s also got a few friends she doubts will get homesick at all; they can’t wait to get away. They’ve got tough home lives, and hard relationships with their parents, and keep saying they’re going to seize this opportunity to ‘break free’. She really hopes they find connections and ‘their people’ at university.

Many qualitative studies have shown that students in this context, who are sometimes estranged, have highly significant friendships at university that become their ‘new family’. Perhaps healthily so. However, if these people are too keen to seek a new tribe, they may make friends with the ‘wrong crowds’ who might lure them into uncharacteristic behaviour. It could go both ways.

Friendships

Jinty knows how to keep friends, having spent the last ten years nurturing and maintaining childhood friendships that turned into mature adult ones. But she can’t stop herself worrying that she’s forgotten how to make friends. She isn’t alone on this: one Student Beans survey including over 2000 students at university found that 95% respondents were worried about not making any friends. Everybody knows that it’s the people who make up university experiences, with interview-based studies finding that in order to keep people enrolled in university, students need to integrate into this social world much better. But what if there are no societies that are just right for Jinty to make friends with likeminded people?

Many studies have also shown there are factors that make friend-making worries even harder. One study found that lower-represented students at university, such as those from a lower-income background or of traveller status experienced more hardships when making friends, and higher levels of isolation.

Also, the relationship between alcohol and friendship at university is nothing new… for generations Freshers’ week has fuelled friendships through lower inhibitions and increased fun. But what if students don’t feel in the mood for drinking? A recent study has found that many soon-to-be university students perceive non-drinkers as people who will struggle making friends. Jinty’s really keen to find her group, but fears she’ll have to binge drink every night in order to make the right impression. She doesn’t know how to resolve that worry.

Spending time with her friends from home is predictable, fun and easy…it’s been tried and tested over the years, and it’s evolved and been made stronger through growing up. What if her new connections aren’t as meaningful? She might be given rubbish flatmates which loads of people complain about online. 85% of respondents in one study at the University of Exeter, said this was their top concern. Jinty also worries about her old friends back home, replacing her with their new friends. Ridiculous idea but real emotion.
In particular, Jinty realises that her home-based friendship group helps her feel the most like herself, and therefore by contrast, forging new friendships may increase self-awareness stress. Jinty’s often  struggled with her identity, and understanding of who she is, and now fears this might make her more prone to peer pressure.

But resourceful Jinty has decided to make friends more easily. It started through finding her flatmates online, and chatting to them, which is typical of many first-year students trying to build their new communities. She quickly thinks she’s got a pretty good idea of them already: sussing out their personalities, comparing them to friends from home, and deciding these will be her new pals. In order for her to feel the safest while entering this new, scary and uncertain experience, she’s decided to stick with people who feel familiar. Which could, of course, limit her development if she doesn’t experience a wider range of social interactions.

Academia

All of Jinty’s teachers at school told her about the leap from A-Level to university that was going to be really difficult. To prepare herself, she’s done all the pre-reading and looked over all of the modules. Even so, she is already worrying about failing the course.
One massive contrast to school is that at Jinty’s uni, the learning will be self-directed, so she’s stressing that without teachers around to provide structure, discipline, worksheets or positive feedback, she won’t manage the workload.

And crucially, what if she doesn’t like her course? She’s actually had that recurring thought for months. She’s been interested in this field of study for so long that it’s really become part of her identity and social currency both at home and with her friends. What if she sleepwalks into a wrong fit? She might get there, realise it’s not for her and have to start the whole process of deciding her career path again. There’s just so much that could go wrong. These thoughts are not easily shared.

How can the adults in Jinty’s life support her transition into adulthood?

  1. Actively Listen to her experiences of university, instead of interrupting with personal judgements and opinions. When a human feels really seen/heard unconditionally and without judgement, a channel for inner trust opens up. Emotional expression and release are vital to good mental health.
  2. Project a safe emotional space where all thoughts can be explored, dismissed, embraced, shunned. It’s all part of healthy growing up. Let the dynamic flow of different personality facets play out as they evolve. Don’t fear what comes up. Don’t rush to label what comes up. Honour the transitory moments of youth.
  3. Look for and acknowledge signs of flourishing. Don’t project your fears, hopes and desires. This is not your life! It is their opportunity to find new independent ways to thrive in a world no one is prepared for. Avoid looking for problems so that you can rush to their rescue – that’s your agenda for self-worth and doesn’t build resilience.
  4. Use language that presupposes self-reliance for thriving: “after you are all settled in your cosy bed with your brand-new duvet, I wonder which books/games/ friends will help you feel most relaxed?”
  5. Clever language orientates their brain in specific directions. Play with words such as ‘THIS’ and ‘THAT’… “That homesickness will surely pass” helps dissociate and dissolve some of the emotional intensity that comes from this

 

How can students just like Jinty, support their transition into adulthood?

  1. Social media is a binary system, completely out of touch with reality as people choose their own filters and give away information according to how they’d like to be perceived. Your life experiences are to be trusted so that you build strong inner wisdom out of whatever you have learned to deal with.
  2. Try as many new things as you can. Plus, playfully using words like ‘I could’ sets up an open mind to new experiences, without feeling under pressure.
  3. Modify your inner dialogue. Instead of conning yourself with a potential lie that could set you up to fail i.e. “you will have the best time” start practising thoughts like “I wonder what will be the most fun to do next week …?”
  4. Identity: who is the real you? You are on a journey of discovery, and nothing is set in stone. So, start to choose activities that bring you alive and help you feel more ‘you’.

 

Helpful reflections of a graduate

Although I did not love my course at first, I soon started loving it as the months went on. My advice would be not to judge it too quickly. Clear up your thinking mind and stay out of judging and analysing.

In retrospect, my best friend at university was the one I did not speak to at all before we met in person. I had absolutely no expectations about who she was, so when we met things were candid, unfiltered, fuelled by genuine curiosity, and our bond was pretty instantaneous!

However, the girls I chatted to before, who I thought would be some of my best friends, were not at all. You can never predict these things from online chats. This also shows how the brain’s predictions are often off the mark, it’s best to live in the moment.

Written by Kay Cooke and Emily Elliott

References

Bristow, L. (2010). An evaluation of an educational intervention aimed at improving confidence, knowledge and skill of university students to cook.

Denham, J. (2013). Can’t cook, won’t cook? A tenth of students never make their own food. Independent.

Grajek, M., Krupa-Kotara, K., Białek-Dratwa, A., Sobczyk, K., Grot, M., Kowalski, O., & Staśkiewicz, W. (2022). Nutrition and mental health: A review of current knowledge about the impact of diet on mental health. Frontiers in Nutrition, 9, 943998.

Eder, M. (2019). University Freshers’ Biggest Worries revealed.

Scharp, K. M., Paxman, C. G., & Thomas, L. J. (2016). “I want to go home” homesickness experiences and social-support-seeking practices. Environment and Behavior, 48(9), 1175-1197.

Biasi, V., Mallia, L., Russo, P., Menozzi, F., Cerutti, R., & Violani, C. (2018). Homesickness experience, distress and sleep quality of first-year university students dealing with academic environment. Journal of Educational and Social Research, 8(1).

Thurber, C. A., & Walton, E. A. (2012). Homesickness and adjustment in university students. Journal of American college health, 60(5), 415-419.

Wilcox, P., Winn, S., & Fyvie‐Gauld, M. (2005). ‘It was nothing to do with the university, it was just the people’: the role of social support in the first‐year experience of higher education. Studies in higher education, 30(6), 707-722.

Wilcox, P., Winn, S., & Fyvie‐Gauld, M. (2005). ‘It was nothing to do with the university, it was just the people’: the role of social support in the first‐year experience of higher education. Studies in higher education, 30(6), 707-722.

Scanlon, M., Leahy, P., Jenkinson, H., & Powell, F. (2020). ‘My biggest fear was whether or not I would make friends’: working-class students’ reflections on their transition to university in Ireland. Journal of Further and Higher Education, 44(6), 753-765.

Gambles, N., Porcellato, L., Fleming, K. M., & Quigg, Z. (2022). “If You Don’t Drink at University, You’re Going to Struggle to Make Friends” Prospective Students’ Perceptions around Alcohol Use at Universities in the United Kingdom. Substance Use & Misuse, 57(2), 249-255.

Thomas, L., Briggs, P., Hart, A., & Kerrigan, F. (2017). Understanding social media and identity work in young people transitioning to university. Computers in Human Behavior, 76, 541-553.

Worsley, J. D., Harrison, P., & Corcoran, R. (2021). Bridging the gap: exploring the unique transition from home, school or college into university. Frontiers in public health, 9, 634285.

Ding, F., & Curtis, F. (2021). ‘I feel lost and somehow messy’: a narrative inquiry into the identity struggle of a first-year university student. Higher Education Research & Development, 40(6), 1146-1160.

Clasen, D. R., & Brown, B. B. (1985). The multidimensionality of peer pressure in adolescence. Journal of youth and adolescence, 14(6), 451-468.

Peel, M. (2000). Nobody cares’: The challenge of isolation in school to university transition. Journal of Institutional Research, 9(1), 22-34.

 

 

Trick for Treat

Witches, wizards and pumpkins as well

Preparing October’s most sinister spell.

Jolly the Ghost with his floating routines

Weirdest this Spook School has ever seen.

“Who can be scary, spooky and mean?

Who can make children’s mothers turn green?

Go gather the loudest screams, moans and cries,

To win Spook School’s Ultimate Halloween prize.”

But as the All Hallows adventures began

Jolly the Ghost kept carefully to plan.

“No, I will not frighten in this competition

For I am Jolly, the great mind magician!”

Yet whispers abound ‘A ghost – Jolly’s not’

Resounded through Spook School and echoed a lot.

His techniques to feel happy, creative, ecstatic

Surely were not real examples of magic.

“Well,” Jolly explained,  “a thought can bring terror

It can also bring laughter, so you see there’s an error!

Today, I’ll teach you real magic inside,

Preparing your most exciting Halloween ride.”

An apparition was conjured within Jolly’s belly

A calm orange pumpkin, fresh, vibrant, not smelly!

Jolly deeply inhaled October’s crisp air

Exhaling long, soft breath, relaxing all cares.

Jolly imagined the pumpkin was breathing

Expanding, contracting, a rhythm most pleasing.

While focusing more on the long outward breath

Jolly’s relaxation helped him to stress-less.

His ghost-mind relaxed more, drifting away

Feelings of floating above all today.

Over Spook City and all who he knows

Jolly feels freedom as his mind magic grows.

Imagineering a floating, relaxing sensation

Brings excitement of calmness into any occasion

In the Halloween spirit, this trick is a treat,

Pumpkin belly breathing is a spell to repeat

Belly Breathing pumpkins have more gifts for you,

Calm-on-demand – empowerment to do.

Jolly notices something while surfing through clouds

Sad Little Witch all alone, crying out loud.

Jolly breathes deeply, imagination stays calm

A sparkle magical wand appears in his ghostly palm

“The others from Spook School; gremlins and ghouls,

Are simply not following all our spook rules.”

I’m feeling so upset, what am I to do?”

“Let’s start by calming those sad feelings in you.

Use magical eyes to find feeling inside

And spin them around until sad feelings subside.”

“If feelings tumble one way or another to  feel bad

Try reversing their direction til you are no longer sad”

Little Witch began describing her actual sensations

Intending a new spell for their evaporation.

Jolly’s ghost-wand spun sparkles into her pain

And From Little Witch’s cloud it started to rain!

Jolly the Ghost smiled “we are not done quite yet

We need to rebalance, so you no longer fret.”

Shifting and shuffling until Witch was sat straight

Jolly helped her adjust, until she felt great.

Little Witch started grinning and cackled with glee

“Can I adventure with you for mind-magic to see?”

And so this contagious thinking arrived into Spook School

As Jolly and Witch shared their mind magic tools.

Terror and calm are both possible now

Both magical thought forms when ghouls, know how.

A new competition is planned for next year

“We’ll teach calmness and fun-shine to balance each fear”

Imagineering can bring both terror or fun

So, let’s learn mind tricks for treats – easily done!

By Emily Elliott and Kay Cooke
All copyrights belong to The Happy Brain Co Ltd

Happy Brain Case Study: The Little Devil

Happy Brain Case Study: The Little Devil

This is a case study about using NLP with a 10-year-old who, quite simply, believed he was a ‘bad kid’ until he discovered he was much more than a his limiting belief…

Adrian was one of the first kids in Class 5 to catch my attention during a Happy Brain™ delivery day. He displayed unruly behaviour, shouting out and generally disagreeing with everyone and anything. Physically, he was loose-toned in his movements with his head tilted off towards his left shoulder; he seemed to have little control over his physiology yet was quite tense. Verbally, he was quick and articulate for his age, though his vocabulary was negative and reactive. Emotionally, he seemed upset, defensive/offensive, and unable to deal with any perceived unfairness during the day and he seemed to be hurting.

Sometimes, when faced with a prevailing attitude of ‘I can’t do this, that, or anything, and I don’t like this, that, or anything’, it helps to change the objector’s focus of attention by enlisting their cooperation. So, I asked Adrian to help me demonstrate an activity in our Calm Confidence Kit; Power Up.

He stood at the front of the class and did the opposite of everything I asked of him. I joked about his polarity response and moved on. “Thank you, Adrian, you can sit down now” as I gestured for him to join the seated class. He sat down on the very spot he had been standing “Well you said sit down,” he challenged, with a literal interpretation of my instruction. Note: I suspected this was his behavioural stance rather than true literal interpretation, which of course some children do make.

“He used to be fine, until Year 2,” confided the teacher during lunch break. “Something seemed to change around that time, and he has become a very naughty boy.” I made a mental note that the teacher had labelled the child’s identity as naughty – rather than specific behaviours – which didn’t give the child anywhere positive to go. Behaviours can be modified whereas identity labels tend to hold people stuck.

After lunch, the final Happy Brain™ activity was to have the children visualise what the inside of their smart-thinking, happy brains might look like. This exercise is metaphoric, creative, expressive, and designed to celebrate difference and uniqueness. Once a clear image, sound or feeling was imagined, the children each began drawing their personalised Happy Brain, and the class soon got busy with colours, shapes, patterns, words, and illustrations. As a generalised observation of this exercise to date, I have often noted that girls seem more inclined to draw pastel-coloured hearts inside their imaginary brains, with special compartments for friendship and love. Whereas boys tend to favour drawing pulleys, levers and use more primary colours.

Adrian drew a spiky mark around the top and outer edges of his brain template and then sat back in his chair, crossed his arms, and announced, “I can’t do this.”

Finding my first opportunity to work one-to-one with him, I pulled up a chair and sat alongside him.

We chatted about his ‘brain’ through the lens of me being a mind coach. I was curious, interested, and I gently began to lead his attention using NLP Milton Model language, which focuses on useful suggestions. “What, until now, has stopped you drawing your happy brain?” I asked.

That powerful phrase, ‘until now’, seemed to work, as he appeared deep in thought for a moment before revealing a nugget of key information:

“I have the devil inside me,” he replied.

Note: Many parents, teachers, adults, or friends would at this point, tell him not to be silly or that he was wrong. Others may even agree with him.  In fact, you might observe your own response to that statement. But I did not pay so much attention to the fierce words because staying within his reality was key. Adrian was simply expressing a limiting belief. “Cooool,” I said, as he gave me a look of suspicion. “So where, on the paper, will you draw that little red guy?”

 

Now at this stage, I most wanted to validate his narrative and belief to stay in rapport, but at the same time I used magical Milton Model language to begin to trick his mind. “That little red guy” did the trick. The word ‘that’ is such a simple way to dissociate someone from an unhelpful picture inside their mind’s eye and conversely, we can move mind-pictures closer by saying ‘this’.

And by replacing the word ‘devil’ with ‘little – red – guy’ and using a matter-of-fact intonation,  I began to unlock his potential to be free from his scary and limiting imagination.

Suddenly, Adrian jolted forward into full drawing mode, released from whatever thoughts had been holding him stuck. Note: Sometimes, to change the emotional state of the person feeling helpless or stuck, all we need to do is give their mind somewhere new to explore.

For the first time that day, he had become focused and on-task. Soon a red, devil-like figure began to emerge on the paper in front of him. His illustration included a pitchfork, a black cloud, rain, and lightning!

He sat back and gave me a confused look that seemed to ask a question and answer a fear simultaneously. “I told you so…”

 

But where is the balancer?” I asked, explaining some basic physics about opposing parts. More language magic – my statement left no room for him to disagree because it not only ‘presupposed’ there was a balancer, but it was also backed up by science. I waited until his eyes stopped moving around (we call these ‘eye-accessing cues’) as he was searching inside his mind for ‘the balancer’.

He found it!

“A golden angel,” he said, “with golden sunshine beaming down”.

And at that very moment his little face illuminated, as I gently touched his left shoulder (closest to me), smiled, and made a strong sound of ‘wowwwwwwww’ (this multi-sensory anchoring provided his nervous system with a kinaesthetic message that associated his happy feelings and happy thoughts, to my touch and sound. I wanted to anchor this moment of delight because Adrian had discovered something that had previously escaped his awareness. Effortlessly, with great focus, care, and attention, he drew his ‘balancer’.

Together we admired the two equal-sized compartments of balance inside his imagination now expressed on the paper in front of him.

Didn’t you know?” I asked in a surprised voice while pointing to his picture “most people have occasionally had a thought just like that one you had about the  little red guy? Thank goodness you have discovered this golden angel!

My voice carried words in a dissociated past tense when referring to ‘that’ little red guy (devil) and into associated present/future for ‘this’ golden angel.

At last Adrian appeared much calmer and less tense and for the first time all day, he offered a positive contribution. “Can I show my drawing to the class?”

As the day came to its end, the class assembled on the mat, all holding their wonderful and various Happy Brain drawings for a class photo, Adrian stood up as my first ‘sharer’. Quietly and methodically, he began to describe the imagined workings of his mind, and as he did this, I gently re-touched the ‘anchor’ on his left shoulder and repeated the ‘wowwwwwwww’ in the same tone as I’d previously used. Just to remind his nervous system of the good feelings we had previously associated to the delight of discovering his golden angel.

The children and teachers listened intently as he described how he had felt opposing parts inside his brain – a devil and an angel. He was finally connecting to his social group by being seen and heard – this time in a positive way.

I asked the class: “Put your hand up if you have ever experienced something just like that little red guy [pointing to the devil on the paper] inside your mind” and as a sea of hands rose in front of us, including that of the class teacher. Adrian’s face flushed into a beaming smile. I suspect that until that moment, he had believed he was alone in his tormenting beliefs related to that little red guy.

We chatted as a whole group about the importance of looking for ‘balancers’ inside our heads.  “How many of you can ride a bike?” I asked for class involvement through a show of hands. “Because you’ll fall off if you stop peddling, won’t you? So, we must keep going to find balance – just like Adrian did, even when he didn’t feel happy. He kept going until he found a happier balance!” The children all seemed to understand the metaphor. “And how many of you could ride a bike when you were aged two?” No hands were raised “So how did you get good at peddling and balancing?”

“Practice!” They called in chorus.

Good point,” I said, “because whatever you practise, you get good at. So, let’s practise looking for Happy Brain balancers inside our minds, shall we?” A resounding ‘yes’ was the reply.

To conclude the day’s activities, I helped the children relax with Balloon Breathing and Body Balance (two activities from our Calm Confidence Kit) and then asked them to imagine floating forward through time to visit their future selves two weeks from now. I future-paced their attention by asking: “How much smarter and happier have you already become because of the two whole weeks you have been practising Balloon Breathing and Body Balance AND looking for Happy Brain balancers?”

Adrian was now sat upright, symmetrical, centred and smiling – so much happier than he had been earlier that day. Of course, in this situation, I didn’t get to influence the systems he lives within – home, school, family, friends, etc. But I did get to challenge a limiting belief that had been holding his identity stuck.

 

Please let us know which parts of this case study resonate most with you!

Boredom Matters

Boredom Matters

“I’m bored.”

Means “I don’t know what to do”?

Which implies “I need to know what to do”?

And therefore “please help me to avoid this feeling of uncertainty.”

TIME is the commodity and EMOTION is the currency; when we have time, we want to fill it will good feelings. And we can.

Yet a cruel outcome of fast-fix good feelings is ‘learned helplessness (“I’m bored – fix my feelings”)’ nourished by passive feel-goods like TV, social media, sugar, alcohol …

Phew!
Anxiety is dissolved by passive feel-goods. But not for long because we never resolve the nagging feeling that we dislike ‘that boredom space’.

Such a shame!
So many people feeling miserable and trapped within the solutions of quick-fixing profiteers.

Because!
Our brains are so easily trained, wired and re-wired.

Rewired by passive learning (the less aware we are of the boredom programming, the easier the acceptance).

Rewired by active learning and creative engagement with boredom to experience new and novel handling of uncertainty:

problem solving – how will I make that old sofa more comfortable?
creation – what kind of meal can I make out of these ingredients?
imagination – what will my garden look like if I dig up the flower bed?
experimentation – which windowsill has best suited my house plant?
exploration – let’s visit that woodland walk I heard about.
discovery – which food upset my digestion?
role play – how does it feel to pretend to be like my favourite calm person?
learning – which thoughts motivate me most?

Boredom!
Provides training ground for THRIVING through adapting and adjusting to difficulties and disappointments. Thriving brains know more conscious CHOICES.

Boredom!
Also provides training ground for SURVIVING through having our attention controlled by someone else. Surviving brains revert to auto-pilot and can’t make conscious choices.

Boredom!
Is a curious description of a state of human consciousness where there is space to be trained into helplessness and survival behaviour, or it is a space to build resourcefulness and resilience for a thriving future.

Thrive!
Let your children – and your own inner child – handle boredom actively …