Boredom Matters

by Kay Cooke | Apr 1, 2023 | be well, mental health, mind-body, neurology, next generation, NLP, parenting, parents, psychology, resilience, workingwithkids

“I’m bored.”

Means “I don’t know what to do”?

Which implies “I need to know what to do”?

And therefore “please help me to avoid this feeling of uncertainty.”

TIME is the commodity and EMOTION is the currency; when we have time, we want to fill it will good feelings. And we can.

Yet a cruel outcome of fast-fix good feelings is ‘learned helplessness (“I’m bored – fix my feelings”)’ nourished by passive feel-goods like TV, social media, sugar, alcohol …

Phew!
Anxiety is dissolved by passive feel-goods. But not for long because we never resolve the nagging feeling that we dislike ‘that boredom space’.

Such a shame!
So many people feeling miserable and trapped within the solutions of quick-fixing profiteers.

Because!
Our brains are so easily trained, wired and re-wired.

Rewired by passive learning (the less aware we are of the boredom programming, the easier the acceptance).

Rewired by active learning and creative engagement with boredom to experience new and novel handling of uncertainty:

problem solving – how will I make that old sofa more comfortable?
creation – what kind of meal can I make out of these ingredients?
imagination – what will my garden look like if I dig up the flower bed?
experimentation – which windowsill has best suited my house plant?
exploration – let’s visit that woodland walk I heard about.
discovery – which food upset my digestion?
role play – how does it feel to pretend to be like my favourite calm person?
learning – which thoughts motivate me most?

Boredom!
Provides training ground for THRIVING through adapting and adjusting to difficulties and disappointments. Thriving brains know more conscious CHOICES.

Boredom!
Also provides training ground for SURVIVING through having our attention controlled by someone else. Surviving brains revert to auto-pilot and can’t make conscious choices.

Boredom!
Is a curious description of a state of human consciousness where there is space to be trained into helplessness and survival behaviour, or it is a space to build resourcefulness and resilience for a thriving future.

Thrive!
Let your children – and your own inner child – handle boredom actively …